Plan B is the new Plan A
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
