All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
I look excited, but its just a facade.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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