I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Randomize
