He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Randomize
