He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
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