In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
