can we get nightvision for the apartment?
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
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