i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
