whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize