dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
