their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Randomize