Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
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