I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Randomize
