something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize
