I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
