I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
The feeling are messing with the penis
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
