grandma shit on top of the toilet
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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