im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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