She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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