im six kinds of drunk right now
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
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