if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
