eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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