we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
