btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Randomize
