He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
