So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
