i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
