margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Randomize
