Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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