It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Randomize
