Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
