Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
