WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize