i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
i now understand why vodka
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Randomize
