you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
