What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Randomize
