what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Randomize
