Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
