help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
