So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
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