why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Welp...herpes.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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