i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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