She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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