Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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