I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize