I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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