Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
