I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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