i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
