ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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