forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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