Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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